So I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately, probably to make up for the lack of writing I’ve been doing – oh, and also because I’ve been on death’s door for the past 8 days. PS – the shower I’m going to take after this post is going to be amazing. I haven’t had a chance to stand on my sea legs for more than 5 minutes until yesterday afternoon. Finally I get to wash and do my hair!
But I digress.
So I have been reading a lot – and a lot about only children. If you’ve read my other posts then you know that I have come to the strict conclusion that I only want one baby, and he’s already here and wonderful. I would also like to say once more that I have almost never been so sure about a decision in my life like I am about this. It just feels right, like when I knew my husband and I would be married – I just knew it was the right choice. Years later I would regret that. (Just kidding honey!)
So I started this one book titled: The Future of Your Only Child: How to Guide Your Child to a Happy and Successful Life
I was at first a little weary. It’s written by a man, who was not and only and doesn’t have an only either. So far not really what I was looking for in terms of support here. Then I actually started to read it, and it made more sense than anything my parents or friends, or even my husband has ever said about me and my behavior and personality being an only. It was incredibly insightful and has helped guide me to the next ‘plane’ of raising an only. I feel confident now, knowing myself more – which means I can raise my son better as an only.
Duh dummies – I highly recommend the book. Go read it, even if you’re slightly thinking about only having one child. Hell, I would recommend it if you just know and only child. It’ll give you insights to their mind that you wouldn’t believe.
I own so many goddamn parenting books it would make your head spin. I don’t know why I keep buying and reading the crap – and yes, most of it is utter GARBAGE let me tell you. I think maybe I’m looking for my ‘holy grail’? The once piece of advice that I don’t know I’m looking for. My ‘a-ha’ moment when everything will become crystal clear and I’ll know how to raise my child perfectly with no more tantrums, no fighting, eating his veggies, being just this perfect little family. And then my dog barfs on the floor, or Ma-Mutt rips off his diaper and pees on the wall, or I forgot to buy diapers, or we’re out of chocolate milk (God help us if that ever happened). The bottom line in MY book is that this is reality. No matter how many books One reads, or classes One takes….One has a parenting style all their own and it’s not likely to change very much. Kind of like how a tiger doesn’t change it’s stripes? The same can be said for Mommies and Daddies. I still will read those books though – it fills me with a sense of accomplishment and understanding. Even if I can’t keep Ma-Mutt from peeing on the walls at least I can say I read about some parents did. I can cling to that hope, but in reality I wouldn’t change those moments of imperfections for anything.
Earlier today I was also perusing some of my favorite blogs and I read and re-read a few on a blog called Only Child Option. You can see it by clicking that cute little link over there on my blogroll ———–>
I wanted to summarize a post that I keep reading, almost once a week. I’m not sure why, I just like the inspiration from it. There is this solidarity and bond between moms on onlies I think. This post just makes me want to fist pump and pop a streamer for all the only-moms out there. For the full frontal view go to her site, por favor.
Times are a-changing. Take a moment and mentally take a walk through your child’s class. You may not know each of them personally, but try to list the ones who are only children. I think you will be surprised. If you can’t do it yourself, ask the teacher. I went through my son’s class a couple weeks ago. In a class of 15, there are 9 only children! He is in Kindergarten, so some of them may still end up with siblings. However, at this point unless there are extenuating circumstances, siblings aren’t generally planned to be 6+ years apart. We are just one step closer to achieving “normal” status for the only child. Very cool!
Woo-hoo! Let’s rock the only child mama thang!
She has also introduced me to a great book that I already ordered called We’re Three.
We’re Three is a darling book by Vivian Cameron-Gallo about the joys of being in a small family – Mom, Dad and one little “bit.” Not only is it a cute story with beautiful illustrations, but it has three pages that invite the child to draw their house, things they do with their family, and a picture of their family. My son drew his pictures and now we have a fantastic family keepsake. You can buy this book at Amazon.com. Enjoy!
DETAILS:
Title: We’re Three: A Story About Families and the Only Child
Awards: 2009 Creative Child Magazine Seal of Excellence; 2010 Creative Child Magazine Book of the Year
Author: Vivian Cameron-Gallo
Illustrator: Christine Simcic
Publisher: Trafford Publishing (2008)
Reading Level: Ages 4-7 but suitable for all ages
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